


O du mein holder Abendstern

by SwanFloatieKnight



Category: Tannhäuser - Wagner
Genre: Being Lost, Bonding, Dreams, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Feelings, Hurt/Comfort, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Platonic Relationships, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-23
Updated: 2019-09-23
Packaged: 2020-10-26 22:14:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20749610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SwanFloatieKnight/pseuds/SwanFloatieKnight
Summary: At first, all seemed beautiful to him. Bright white shone from the trees, from the bushes, from the grass, even the sky was white, and the sun gave off a bright radiance turning everything, all this white, into silver. And as long as she was by his side, the silver seemed to glow.





	O du mein holder Abendstern

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Silavon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silavon/gifts).

> not betaed, sorry not sorry

A/N: I posted this fic on Ao3, and on Ao3 alone. If you read this on any other website or platform, please consider that I did not consent to this.

* * *

He was walking through a forest, a forest of blinding white. There was a soft clinking when he walked, a wonderful sound to his ears. The clinking was quiet, but it sounded like little bells chiming in the distance. Nothing else moved, nothing else sounded. Not even a slight breath of air brushed through the treetops. Only the soft clinking was to be heard, and he was there, moving and living, but he felt somewhat lost.

Then she came, Elisabeth. She took him by the hand and led him through the shining forest for a while and he was more than willing to follow her. At first, all seemed beautiful to him, with her now even more. Bright white shone from the trees, from the bushes, from the grass, even the sky was white, and the sun gave off a bright radiance turning everything, all this white, into silver. And as long as she was by his side, the silver seemed to glow.

“Heinrich”, she said to him, and her voice sounded like the bells beneath his feet. There was something sweet in the sound of his name when she called it. Something that made his chest feel tight and his heart ache. She smiled at him, and he returned the smile, and walked on, not noticing that her feet did not seem to touch the ground. At least, she made no noise.

After a while, the soft voice next to him calling him “Heinrich” sounded less distant, but also less pleasant. It distracted him to know her next to him, but he did not really know why. Then, he started to realize that all this beautiful white around him came from the frost, the forest was frozen and the cold was slowly seeping into his bones and into his heart.

The cold had claimed the forest he was walking through, and now it claimed his body. It would not be long until it would try to claim his soul. The branches next to him were frozen, glistening white with frost. He was walking through snow, ankle-deep, biting into his skin, and he suddenly realized where the soft clinking he had first found beautiful really came from. Like breaking glass the leaves and branches sounded when he stepped onto them and they crumbled beneath his bare feet. Like glass, or like ice.

Heinrich stopped and looked around him. The trees in front of him still looked pure, white and untouched, but behind him there was a path of destruction. The trees were black and broken, the grass under his feet was shattered, and the shards of the frozen plants he had crushed while walking had cut his feet. The bright white was stained with blood.

He turned to Elisabeth, in shock, only to find her smiling at him, not even caring about the ruins he left. And it was only him who left these ruins. Because her feet indeed did not touch the ground, or if they did, they did not put any weight onto it. She was rather floating through the forest than actually walking, and now that she saw what Heinrich had done with his heavy, crushing steps, her eyes darkened with sadness.

“Do not look for too long at what you have done”, she said quietly and shook her head. “Come, let us move on. There is nothing left for us to dwell on.”

She pointed ahead of them, where the forest still lay in untouched beauty, and wanted to lead him on. But Heinrich shook his head. He had seen enough to realize he did not belong here, not in this pure, white cold, not in this silvery shining forest. He did not belong with _her_.

He tore his hand off of hers and turned around. He ran, back to where he had come from, through the shattered, blood-stained, ruined forest. The forest that once had been white and untouched and beautiful, and now was nothing more than ruined beauty, crumbled trees and broken ice. He felt a sting in his eyes, and he did not know whether it was from the dazzling white or from tears…

But he ran and ran, his heart was pounding, his lungs were burning from the harsh intakes of breath and his skin was burning from the cold, sweat was running down his forehead and his cheeks – or were it tears? His feet were still bleeding, still crushing ice and frozen plants, but he felt no pain and no regret. He only wanted to get out of here, away from the destruction he had caused, and find a place, somewhere, where he belonged.

Even though he did not really hope for it. Not anymore.

He did not realize that after a while the white begun to lack the eye-hurting brightness, and all of a sudden the sun had sunk and it was dark. He had already stopped running some time ago, every breath hurting his chest, and now he stumbled along the path he had treaded before until he could walk no longer. He simply collapsed to the ground, into the snow, and could not move any more.

Darkness lingered between the broken trees and dripped into his broken heart. The night was bitterly cold, but he had long stopped shivering. His eyes stared into the black sky, not seeing anything. His whole body felt numb, but most of all his soul. Was there even damage done by the sharp splinters of ice that had cut him?

He hardly remembered the gleaming white of the forest anymore. Now everything was broken, but even this everything felt not like much. Should it be broken, then. It were just feelings, nothing more. What did he care? And after all, he himself felt just as broken as the forest around him.

… just… feelings…

Heinrich did not hear the steps approaching him, but if he had, he would have expected Elisabeth to return. Only, it was not Elisabeth who knelt down beside him and pulled him into his arms.

It was a man with a deep and warm voice, who had strong hands and a smile in his eyes. He seemed to be glowing in the darkness, otherwise Heinrich would not had mentioned him. After he had blinked a few times, he was even able to actually see the person that had first towered like another shadow above him. And he recognized him.

It was Wolfram. Wolfram had come for him, and had put his arms around him and was now holding him close to his chest. Heinrich could hear his heartbeat. He could feel warm breath brushing over his forehead, and then Wolfram’s hot body on his cool skin, trying to warm him up. A half-broken smile he could no longer suppress crept onto his lips.

“Have you come for me? Do you want me to come with you?”, he whispered into the night.

But he could feel Wolfram shaking his head. “No. No, I don’t think you can come with me.” Warm fingers on his face, in his hair, caring, loving. “But we can stay here together, if you want to.”

“You will stay, too?” He could hardly hide his surprise.

“I will stay with you, Heinrich. Always”, Wolfram whispered. “But if you want to leave, you will have to find your own way. Just like everyone else. I cannot take you with me. Everything I can do is to help you getting on your feet again if you should fall.”

“I understand.” Heinrich nodded hesitantly. Then they fell silent.

There were no more words, nothing to be said between them. Together they floated in the cold darkness, and Heinrich suddenly mentioned that something had changed. When Wolfram had cradled Heinrich into his arms, the stars had appeared, shining icy and cold in the black night, that now seemed less bitter.

Just like Wolfram’s tenderness, the stars had given the night a soft glow. Heinrich could breath easier now, and all the shattered pieces around him and inside of him felt less painful. A simple touch from Wolfram had mended a lot.

He was there to help him up again if he should fall. Maybe he should try to gather his strength to get up and take the first step. Not right now, but the time would come, he was certain. Maybe, one day he would even find the strength to get up and continue his way on his own. After all, Wolfram was there for him. He was at his side.

Maybe a day would come when he would be able to walk over the shards and no longer feel the pain. Maybe they would even no longer cut his feet by then.

After all, these shattered pieces were just feelings.

**Author's Note:**

> … just… feelings…  
a shitload of feelings…  
it's almost 1am here and I should go to bed now. I really should.


End file.
